Series Continued: 21 Habits of Joyful People –Part 3

Here’s a recap of those habits of joyful people covered in previous entries...

Joyful People:

1 Appreciate Life

2 Choose Friends Wisely

3 Are Considerate

4 Learn Continuously

5 Use Creative Problem Solving

6 Do What They Love

Note:  Many thanks to Dr. Michelle McCollum for her portion of content in this series. Photo credits: Google Images and Personal Collection

Enjoy Life

“A man can only do what he can do. But if he does that each day, he can sleep at night and do it again the next day.” ~Albert Schweitzer

Take the time to see the beauty around you. There’s more to life than work. Take time to smell the roses, watch a sunset or sunrise with a loved one, take a walk along the seashore, hike in the woods etc.

5 LINX Super Saturday Training - Embassy Suites Dallas, TX 

Learn to live in the present moment and cherish it. Don’t live in the past. Learn from it. Don’t live too much in the future. Just prepare for it.

“Well, one thing, at least is good: it is for a man to eat well, drink a good glass of wine, accept his position in life, and enjoy his work whatever his job may be, for however long The LORD may let him live. And of course, it is very good if a man has received wealth from The LORD, and the good health to enjoy it. To enjoy your work and to accept your lot in life – that is indeed a gift from GOD. The person who does that will not need to look back with sorrow on his past, for GOD gives him joy.”

~Ecclesiastes 5:18-20

Keep Their Word

Honesty is the best policy. Socrates said it like this: “The greatest way to live with honor in this world is to be what we pretend to be.”

Every action and decision you make should be based on honesty. Be honest with yourself and with your loved ones. If you find that you are unable to keep your word, say something. Don’t just ignore your promise hoping no one will remember. That seldom works out well.

“It’s not what we eat, but what we digest that makes us strong; not what we gain, but what we save that makes us rich; not what we read but what we remember that makes us learned; and not what we profess but what we practice that gives us integrity.” ~Frances Bacon, Sr. quote

Forgive

Forgiveness is a key ingredient to true peace.  In Luke 17:4, we learn “Even if a person wrongs you seven times a day and each time turns again and asks forgiveness, you must forgive.”

Holding a grudge will hurt no one but you. Forgive others for your own peace of mind. When you make a mistake – own up to it – learn from it – and FORGIVE yourself.

In the chapter on forgiving yourself of the wonderful book by Paul Meyer, Forgiveness:  …the Ultimate Miracle” he gives “The top 13 reasons why forgiving yourself is hard” and they are listed below.

“For most people, forgiving themselves is a very difficult thing to do. Is that true for you? If so, why? Perhaps it is because:

§  You can justify the actions of others, but not your own

§  You still feel guilty, regardless of what others say

§  You cannot accept failure

§  You have to live with yourself

§  You cannot escape your past

§  You can give grace, but you cannot receive it

§  You couldn’t possibly pay for what you did

§  Your mind will not stop replaying the incident

§  You don’t feel worthy of forgiveness

§  You don’t believe others and God have really forgiven you

§  You refuse to forgive others

§  You simply don’t know how

WHATEVER the reason – or excuse – you still need to forgive yourself . I repeat, YOU NEED TO FORGIVE YOURSELF!

When you forgive yourself after forgiving others, you finish the circle of forgiveness. You are completely free to enjoy all the benefits of forgiveness without the side effects of unforgiveness.”

Laugh

“Trouble knocked on the door, but hearing laughter, hurried away.” ~Benjamin Franklin

Don’t take yourself – or life to seriously. You can find humor in just about any situation. Laugh at yourself – no one’s perfect. When appropriate, laugh and make light of the circumstances.

Breakfast at Tiffany’s is one of my favorite films. The lead played by the late Audrey Hepburn sharing my same sentiment, remarked: “I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it’s the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. It’s probably the most important thing in a person.”

Naturally there are times that you should be serious as it would be improper to laugh. Often when people are uncomfortable or don’t know what to say they will laugh as a reflex. Ask yourself, “Am I laughing at someone’s pain?” And if the answer is yes, of course it would be best that you not laugh. However, if it’s not at the expense of another, I say by all means have yourself the best belly laugh you can get out of it.

With DPSVP Barry Donalson at 5 LINX Super Saturday in Dallas, TX 

I remember reading once that “Laughter is the human body wagging its tail.”  Laughing just makes you feel good. Do it as much as you can and share generously!

Are Grateful

“Since everything God created is good, we should not reject any of it but receive it with thanks.” ~1 Timothy 4:4 (NLT)

Develop an attitude of gratitude. Count your blessings; All of them – even the things that seem trivial. Be grateful for your home, your work and most importantly your family and friends. Take the time to tell them that you are happy they are in your life.

“To educate yourself for the feeling of gratitude means to take nothing for granted, but to always seek out and value the kindness that stands behind the action. Nothing that is done for you is a matter of course. Everything originates in a will for it.” ~Albert Schweitzer

“It is impossible for you to be angry and laugh at the same time. Anger and laughter are mutually exclusive and you have the power to choose either.”

~Wayne Dyer

“Silent gratitude isn’t much use to anyone.” Gladys Brown Stern

Thanks so much for Reading and Sharing The Love!!!

Persuasion: A Key Leadership Skill by Barbara Baggerly-Hinojosa

Photo Credit: Laurie Madden Mire/
Laurie Mire Photography

I have good news for you.  You don’t have to be a slick salesperson in order to be persuasive.  The skill of persuasion is simply the ability to convince others rather than coercing compliance. During a recent seminar I conducted at Texas State Technical Institute, the skill of persuasion was one that prompted the most discussion.  The Servant Leader primarily relies on making decisions within an organization based on persuasion rather than positional authority. 

In other words, you will never hear the Servant Leader say, “do it because I am the boss and I say to.”  This particular element offers one of the clearest distinctions between the traditional authoritarian model of leadership and the concept of servant leadership.  The technique of convincing rather than coercing is one of the most effective ways a Servant Leader can build consensus within groups.

Photo Credit for remaining pictures:
Google Images

Instead of making a big deal about something and telling your colleagues that they have to change, “or else,” the Servant Leader has learned to use a method of gentle but clear and persistent persuasion.  Leadership by persuasion has the ability to encourage change by convincement rather than coercion.  Its advantages are enormous.  Just think about it, aren’t you more apt to make a change if someone has convinced you of it as opposed to telling you that you MUST change because the boss said so?  In order to be highly persuasive, a leader must have developed relationships with others. Effective leaders are able to form bonds with others that result in relationships.  These relationships allow for open communication that lay the way for trust.  People who trust you will be more easily persuaded by you.

A final point to keep in mind is this…effective Servant Leaders who are great persuaders don’t ask themselves, “who can help me?” but instead ask, “whom can I help?”  There are some basic techniques that can help you develop your persuasive skills.  I hope you will try some of them this week and join me on this great journey to become the most effective Servant Leader we can be. 

As discussed in more detail in my book, Are You a 10? The Ten Characteristics of a Servant Leader (2010), the following tips can help you as you develop your persuasion skills:

• Create Transparency
• Practice Fairness
• Develop Consistency
• Build Consensus

Barbara Baggerly-Hinojosa is a mother, educator, and wife living in the Rio Grande Valley in Texas.  She is a PhD student with Our Lady of the Lake University in Leadership Studies.  Mrs. Baggerly-Hinojosa is currently researching the relationship between the leadership of the high school principal and the high school drop out rate.  This article is an excerpt from the  book, Are You A Ten?  The Ten Characteristics of a Servant Leader.   For ordering information, please contact Mrs. Baggerly-Hinojosa at Barbara@leadershipempoewrmentgroup.com or like us on Facebook at Leadership Empowerment Group, LLC.  Ordering information can also be found at Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble.com.

A Sense of Awareness by Barbara Baggerly-Hinojosa

TheChortle.com

Robert K. Greenleaf (1970) described awareness as a disturber and awakener.  In order to lead more effectively, one must have a keen sense of awareness.  A general awareness, as well as a self- awareness, is necessary for a leader to ensure that the correct actions are taken. 

Photo Credits: Google Images

Many times we all know of things that are just not right, but we hesitate to acknowledge them because then by the sheer fact of awareness we are responsible for doing something.  It is much easier to stick our heads in the sand and not allow ourselves to be aware of things around us that may need changing. 

Kouzes and Posner (2007) listed Self- Awareness as one of the domains of Emotional Intelligence.  The authors explain that if a leader is not aware of his/her strengths and weaknesses, then there is no path for improvement.  Goleman, Boyatzis, and McKee (2002) also describe Self-Awareness as a key characteristic of Resonant Leadership.  The authors state, “simply put, self-awareness means having a deep understanding of one’s values and motives” (p. 40). 

Leaders who are self-aware know exactly where they are going because they understand their values, goals, and dreams.   According to Kouzes and Posner (2007), “learning to be a better leader requires great self-awareness, and it requires making ourselves vulnerable.  Modeling that for others makes it easier for them to do the same when it becomes their turn” (p. 87). These leaders typically engage in self reflection and time of thought. 

In order to be able to address weaknesses that were discovered through the process of becoming self-aware, the following should be considered.

·         Step back and gain perspective

·         Ask yourself what new skills and knowledge you need

·         Set goals and make a plan

·         Get help and support from others

Barbara Baggerly-Hinojosa is a mother, educator, and wife living in the Rio Grande Valley in Texas.  She is a PhD student with Our Lady of the Lake University in Leadership Studies.  Mrs. Baggerly-Hinojosa is the President of the Leadership Empowerment Group, LLC and is currently researching the relationship between the leadership of the high school principal and the high school drop out rate.  Mrs. Baggerly-Hinojosa is the author of Are You A Ten?  The Ten Characteristics of a Servant Leader.   

For ordering information, please contact Mrs. Baggerly-Hinojosa at Barbara@leadershipempowermentgroup.com or visit Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble.com.

Are You Up for the Challenge? By Barbara Baggerly-Hinojosa

PHOTO CREDITS: http://i-lead.com and Google Images

In The Leadership Challenge (2007), Kouzes and Posner describe leaders as ordinary people who are accomplishing extraordinary things by seeing challenging circumstances as opportunities to practice leadership.  Through research, surveys, and case studies  the authors describe five practices of exemplary leadership, along with ten basic commitments for applying these practices.

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 The five practices of exemplary leadership that the authors identify are:  (1) Model the Way, (2) Inspire a Shared Vision, (3) Challenge the Process, (4) Enable Others to Act, and (5) Encourage the Heart.

When describing Model the Way, the authors emphasize that exemplary leaders understand that even the word “leader” means to go first.  Modeling means going first and living the behaviors you want to see in others.  Kouzes and Posner state, “leaders take every opportunity to show others by their own example that they’re deeply committed to the values and aspirations they espouse” (pg. 75).   The authors also explain that in order for a leader to Model the Way, the leader must first know what to model. 

The authors describe many processes for developing a self-awareness that will allow the leader to identify shared values.  This process of self-awareness has also been extensively researched by Robert K. Greenleaf (1970) in his work on Servant Leadership.  Greenleaf states that awareness is a disturber and an awakener.  In addition, Goleman, Boyatzis, and McKee (2002) identified Self-Awareness as a domain of Emotional Intelligence that is essential for a leader to create resonance in an organization.  Bass & Avolio (1994) also discussed the idea of modeling the way when they described transformational leadership in terms of Idealized Influence.

Inspire a Shared Vision is the second practice described by Kouzes and Posner when defining exemplary leadership practices.  Inspire a Shared Vision is described as the ability to communicate effectively a shared vision that others take as their own.  The authors discuss the need for a leader to be able to envision the future.  Exemplary leaders “are able to envision the future, to gaze across the horizon of time and imagine the greater opportunities to come” (pg. 105).  Greenleaf (1970) also described the importance of leaders being forward looking in his description of the Servant Leadership characteristic of Foresight.  Greenleaf stated that a leader must learn from the lessons of the past in order to plan for the future.  In addition, other researchers such as Bass & Avolio (1994) addressed the concept of vision when they described transformational leadership.

The third practice as described by Kouzes and Posner is Challenge the Process.  The authors explain that exemplary leaders are adopters of innovation.  The authors continue with an explanation of how innovation comes from a leader’s ability to listen and communicate effectively.  Again, there is a connection with Greenleaf’s work on Servant Leadership (1970).  Greenleaf explains that servant leaders must develop the characteristic of Listening in order to lead and serve effectively.  Goleman, et al. (2002) also describes the importance of listening and innovation in the Emotional Intelligence domain of Relationship Management. Kotter’s change process (1996) is also correlated with Challenging the Process as it involves how a leader leads through change.

Enable Others to Act is the fourth practice detailed by the authors of The Leadership Challenge (2007).  This practice is described as the ability of the leader to encourage people and help them feel they are able to put their ideas in action.  Greenleaf (1970) described an effective leader as a person who helps others grow personally, professionally, and spiritually.  In research conducted by Goleman, et al. (2002), the leadership style of Coaching describes a leader who says, “Try this.”

The final practice listed by Kouzes and Posner is Encourage the Heart.  People act best when they are passionate about what they are doing.  It is the leader’s job to release the energy and enthusiasm in others with the use of stories and other communication techniques.  This practice is similar to the leadership style of Affilitative as described by Goleman, et al. (2002).

           

Are you ready for the challenge of leadership?  In order to be a more effective leader, please consider the following:

·         Leaders are active learners – one reason leaders are active learners is because they are humble about their own abilities.

·         Treat every job as an adventure – approach every new assignment as an opportunity to start over.

·         Seize the initiative – guide others through adversity, uncertainty, and hardships.

Barbara Baggerly-Hinojosa is a mother, educator, and wife living in the Rio Grande Valley in Texas.  She is a PhD student with Our Lady of the Lake University in Leadership Studies.  Mrs. Baggerly-Hinojosa is the President of the Leadership Empowerment Group, LLC and is currently researching the relationship between the leadership of the high school principal and the high school drop out rate.  Mrs. Baggerly-Hinojosa is the author of Are You A Ten?  The Ten Characteristics of a Servant Leader.   For ordering information, please contact Mrs. Baggerly-Hinojosa at Barbara@leadershipempowermentgroup.com or visit Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble.com